outer-jessie's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The beginning of the end of lies What is up with all the new fake diaries popping up all over the place? They take the joy out of random voyeuristic diary visits. Frownie. Hang on, let's see how much I can write before this coffee kicks in to usurp my menstrual constipation...hm, how much "I" can actually squeeze into a TMI? Things are going drownishly. That being the opposite of swimmingly. G and I have trekked all the way over to the east coast to have two monumental fallings out, one stemming from jealousy and the other stemming from cowardice. I'll leave the assignment of blame for each of these up to you, but will tell you we each get one. We are currently in residence in a dingy motel room in the surprisingly congested Bedford, MA, a town which apparently believes more strongly in yield signs than stoplights. We are, in theory, en route to my aunt's house a half hour off to begin telling the tale of the dissolution of my marriage, my lesbianism, and my wonderful girlfriend. Who is currently only my wonderful angry semi-friend because of what happened last night, which was nothing, but was supposed to be a big something. Telling my grandmother. Didn't happen. Chicken. Although my dear G has already sworn off any connection to me (which is especially tortuous because she is the most adorable thing in a hood right now - dammit), this beginning of telling the tale to my aunt and cousin (and other grandmother, but she is too far gone at this point to notice any change, wethinks) is potentially a really huge deal. Telling one cousin is equivalent to telling all of them, over the course of a few days, via Facebook. And the look on this cousin's face will, I think, be indicative of what's to come from the full collection of cousins. On both sides. Then again, maybe not. I really don't know WHAT is going to happen, which is why I've been so eager/resigned about just putting it out there and dealing with the consequences. That is how I do things. My parents, on the other hand, have their own (stupid) way of proceeding, which is why so much gum is now in the works and why my precious G is not speaking to me. It makes me very angry that they didn't hold up their end of the deal, but my hands are tied. At least, this is how it appears to me. In any case, once the cousins know, and the aunts and uncles know, it's a short skip from there to my grandmother. Supposedly, my mother is planning to tell her on Thursday (or else, I said, I would tell her everything on Friday). But if word spreads as soon as I think it might, she will know by tomorrow. And she is going to be livid about being the last to know. The blame for which belongs to my mother and father, but which I will need to claim for myself. Bogus. Well, so be it then. We will see how this all goes down. The old deadline was yesterday, and obviously that deadline has passed; the new deadline is Christmas, because I am bringing G home with me (if she even wants to come at that point) and we will see whomever is willing to see us. In other news, still no student assistant. Had one student email me for the application, but that was a week ago and I never got it back from her. Better send her a reminder email. You know, just to be as annoying and off-putting as possible so as to ensure my own failure. In other other news, G is in the shower and the coffee has hit the lower pipes. Wish me luck with that. 7:06 a.m. - 2009-10-06 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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