outer-jessie's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Remove shoe. Shoot self in foot. Time for me to write something for me. Not my dissertation, which has morphed and twisted and spawned in dark and unholy ways...me. That said, I don't feel that I have all that much to say, really, although I'm sure I can say so in as long-winded and pretentious a manner as possible. Hm. Pernicious knid. No really. I wanted to say something about how strange it is that, just because G will be gone for two days, and despite the fact that our place is in fact emptier without her, how claustrophobic it feels to be here when she's not. I don't even want to move around in a room, never mind move to a different room. I don't even want to stand. I don't know what that is - what is that? Why am I afraid to move when she's not here? It's not like I'm afraid for my safety...it's more that I'm afraid for hers. How that translates into "best stay still until she gets back," I do not know. Confession: After years of working/not working on this dissertation (mostly the latter), I am hitting a wall. Or a deadline shaped like a wall. In any case, I'm veering toward it at a break-neck speed and it doesn't appear to have any intention of turning spongy upon my arrival. In literal terms, this means I've got about ten days to finish this thing. TEEEEEENNNNN DAAAYYYYYYSSSS. At which point I will turn into a pumpkin and my computer will turn into dust. Would it interest you to know that I was supposed to be finished with what I'm currently working on almost three weeks ago? Or that my paid work is piling up around me and saying threatening and demeaning things to me? No, I suppose it wouldn't. If it's even remotely, laughably possible that I finish two chapters and all the edits on the previous two chapters by the end of this week, that gives me one week to put together a whole lit review. HA HA HA HA HA HA I am such an idiot. I need a nap. 5:57 p.m. - 2010-10-20 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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