outer-jessie's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lucky Jessie Chat: come on. What's up. Why aren't you working. I'm bored and want to talk. Is it so hard for you to work consistently? You take WAY more sick days than I do. I know you guys have probably already gathered this by now, and don't need your jealousy sparked yet again by being reminded of it, but I must tell it once more: being me rocks the Casbah, man. Every so often, something comes up that reminds me that being me rocks. This time, it was the fact that I don't have to pray. Woo! No praying! When I was small and devout, I used to pray all the time, and aspire to be saintly, and make lots of sacrifices throughout the day to assure the rosy view of me being sent to heaven. Fuck, that was miserable! I denied myself all sorts of harmless fun, and thought I was sinful in myriad ways, and tortured myself by subverting my will to The Will, or what have you. That's the problem with being an over-achiever, I tell you. Most of the time you overdo it in a positive direction, but some of the time you overdo it in a negative direction. And now, as a result of, you know...*whispers "the atheism"*...all that stuff doesn't bother me any more. A lot of people would claim otherwise in my stead, but I can assure you I'm a lot happier this way. I'm not less moral than I was, or less self-aware, or meaner, or less selfish, I'm just less needlessly self-sacrificing. It's fantastic. [DISCLAIMER: 1) The above was not intended to convert or persuade anyone of any inclination whatsoever. 2) The writer does not require your prayers for her everlasting soul, although those prayed in private will be appreciated for the kind gestures they are. 3) The writer will not pray even if it can be shown to be fun and beneficial, for the simple reason that she DOES NOT BELIEVE in gods.] 1:51 p.m. - 2002-10-08 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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