outer-jessie's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- down Some people can do things with words, and some can't. I'm one of the ones that can't, so all right. And I'm not one of those people who grew up and Became Something. Mine is a life more or less ordinary, in short. I find that mighty disappointing, myself, seeing how I was touted as one with suuuuuch promise when I was younger. I suppose you actually have to do something with your promise, if you intend to keep it. If I *poof* became a famous musician right now, I'd name my band My Promise, and all the little kids would misunderstand, and that would amuse me. But I have no musical talent, so that's that. And I'm not sure what talent I once had, that had suuuuuch promise. What was it, my ability to memorize things? The fact that I was fairly good-natured in public? That I enjoyed exceling in school? I think that kind of promise expires once you graduate. It was all a slightly underhand ruse to schmooze (hey, a poem!) the teachers anyway. All I wanted to do was succeed in school. All I never knew, was school. Well I'm not in school anymore, and I have to find out where my real talents lie, and if I can actually use them. Discover my real promise, if one does in fact exist. I'd like to say that I have faith in me, and I know I'll find what I'm looking for. But this isn't a movie, and it isn't fiction. You never know what's going to happen. The main character might fail and learn nothing from the experience. It's possible. There are a lot of things I've missed, and one of them could be The Moral of the Story. Here's a story with an ambiguous moral for you. You know the other night when I took a way too long a nap and woke up around bedtime? Well, no better time than bedtime for a Zoog movie, *I* always say. I ended up watching Parent Trap II before falling asleep. There were two little girls in it; one of them I knew, she was the little girl in Savannah Smiles, and the other one I didn't. For no real good reason, I went to the imdb yesterday to look them up and see what happened to them. The little girl I didn't know, she ended up going to Vassar or something, and becoming a lawyer. Wow! The little girl I did know, she's dead. FUCKING DEAD. She died five years ago; she was about my age. Accidental overdose of drugs and alcohol. The moral of this story is, there's no moral to this story. 10:59 a.m. - 2002-06-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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